Having myself back is dreaming and reaching about my most beloved dreams again, being able to believe, trust, and knowing that things finally after all get better. It's no game anymore, it's stand in what I trust on and stay firm in It. Like how "this is home" says
"Now I'm finally where I belong"
Breathing again and having guts is not something that happenes everyday.
All I know is that I'm on my way to do what I live, and He'll be there.