I am gonna reconsider my last entry, I read it, and I saw myself giving up. Actually, yesterday I broke down a little, like I don' t have any time to being at home, and if I've got some, I just wanna hug my family, but sometimes they are not on their best mood so we can' t enjoy much. Yeah I know I am too attached to my family, is a fact. I went to bed at 2.30 am, tired, wasted; Thursday didn' t last much and I hated it.
Today I woke up 7.20. Slept 5 hours? Dad obviously came up to my room telling me I should be more responsible. C'mon, who does like to be scold at that hour and worst of all don' t sleep much as you should?. My morning was going otherwise it should, my week beggining had been the best in my last two years, forgivness and heart mended don' t happen always.
I didn' t sleep well, so I didn' t hold my job as it must.
I complain about a lot of things in my mind, and sincerely thought about quitting my job, because college, life, swimming, dancing, friends and job can' t come along, you end up in vegetative state. But then I went out and drunk mate with my cousin, as a little break.
Thought about my salary I earned yesterday. Cardigan, shoes, scarfs and every single fall season clothes I' m coming for you, how my heart got mended after ALL, how sadly and joyfully becoming independent is part of life, and most of all I' m on a carrer I love, thought at the future I' m gonna sacrifice more things that know, but give time to time, enjoy and build the present, dream about the future. So I just five minutes ago, found out I got to get used to this, trying to live happily because it' s part of growing up.
Then I read the only girl on earth is so alike to me : Keltie, her last entry made me smile, I just remember my early teenage when I used to fell in love with classmate boys and trying to get their e-mail whatever it took, and always dressing priceless just for them. That was living.
So then I saw my cousin smiling and having fun with me at that little break and watched the little fram in the back yard.
Got the most priceless memory, I'm gonna write right now: When this little house didn' t even existed there was a big yard with just 3 starcaise where I used to pretend I was a diva and the neighboorhoods used to make pumpy parties, then I came back and I told myself: «life is good, God is good, love is good»,
So far, I' m not thinking about giving up at all, not yet, not now. I'm in the peak of building my whole life dreams, so why complain?
Etiquetas: life my life
